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#1 The author, Jennifer, was preparing dinner for her boyfriend, Craig, when she felt a wave of rage rise within her. She had developed a sense that Craig would not disappear if she were to confront him with anger. She impulsively knocked her elegantly laid-out meal onto the floor.
#2 The relationship between Craig and Jennifer serves as a great example of how mismatch and repair can lead to emotional growth. They were able to bring their respective different intentions and motivations into their relationship, and it grew from there.
#3 The original still-face experiment had revealed a new way to understand babies and parents, but there was still so much to learn about this primary relationship. The research revealed that messiness is essential for strong relationships.
#4 We found that the most important part was not the mismatch, but the repair. In analyzing these videotapes, we discovered that the most important part was not the mismatch but the repair.
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